Diary Of An IB Student #1

IB therefore I am.

I heard the shrill warnings when I chose my Sixth Form pathway about how the IB would take over my life and how I would reminisce about the sweet old days when I could afford to go out and see friends. I naively laughed off their warnings as a big, over-exaggerated, dramatic joke.

But, yes, only four months into my International Baccalaureate, I can see what they were on about when they said 'IB therefore I am'. It's one heck of a soul-consuming education programme.

I never often finish my work before 10, which is proving very difficult for my Netflix addiction. What's more, there's always the ever-looming presence of some sort of coursework about to be set or a test on some incomprehensible science topic. My workload is like a dark, omnipresent grey cloud that is forever impending on me.

Maybe I'm being too negative and, knowing that I'm speaking to a predominantly non-IB audience, I am hyperbolising my experiences in order to obtain sympathy from those studying A-Levels or, even worse, those actually in the outside world.

Because, really, I'm going to speak out. It's not that bad really. Yes, I get hardly any free-periods during the week. But that means I have learnt to appreciate the free periods that I do have and, to a large extent, they are used efficiently. What's more, the IB has meant that seeing those at my school who study A-Levels (the other education pathway on offer) has become a near impossibility. However, without a doubt, it has made the time that we do manage to squeeze in together even more special. Even if they cannot understand why you have so many bags under your eyes due to lack of sleep.

Aside from the social aspect, or lack thereof, let me talk about what actually matters - why one actually chooses to study six subjects (well, seven. Theory Of Knowledge should always be counted). When offered to embark on the International Baccalaureate programme, they tell you that it really is the best way to receive a rounded education at an advanced level and keep your options for the future open. Now, if anyone out there is the typical deer in headlights when it comes to thinking about the future, then the IB is really a no-brainer. Sometimes enduring the horrors of science and maths if that's not your thing can be a bit arduous, but the benefits are clear.

As is often said in reference to this beauty of an education programme - 'The IB is like vegetables. Sometimes it doesn't taste nice, but you know it's good for you so you eat it up anyway'.

Coupled with the six subjects are three core elements of the IB that make it, admittedly, a lot more time-consuming than A-Levels, but actually have their benefits. At least, I can see the benefits right now while writing this. Perhaps I'm just in a good mood. I certainly don't feel this way about TOK at 7:00AM every morning.

If nothing else, the core (Theory Of Knowledge; Creativity, Action and Service and Extended Essay) really teaches important BS skills that have important applications in life post-education. I mean, who doesn't see the benefit in writing a 700 word reflection journal on participating in a yoga class?

Yet we saunter on, bs-ing along the way as though in the dark, hoping we'll surface after the two years with a diploma in our hand and without too many nervous breakdowns.

It's not about succeeding in the IB. It's about surviving. A decent survival at times, but nonetheless a survival.

So, it would seem as though this time it's not 'IB therefore I am'.
It's 'IB therefore I BS'

L x

It's OK To Embrace Your Inner Schmidt

Whilst engaging in my favourite past-time of procrastinating from the hideous, nervous breakdown-inducing amount of work I have to do, I visited BuzzFeed in order to increase my own self-awareness and knowledge by completing their quizzes.

Lo and behold! What do we have here? A quiz titled 'Which "New Girl" Character Are You?'. It was my lucky day. Here I am, jovially ticking my answers of choice without a care in the world. And then it hits me, at the very bottom of the page.

You got: Schmidt

How are you supposed to react when news so terribly life-changing enters your world? I was dumbfounded, I was struck with a sense that I would never quite be the same ever again. It was that dramatic.

I guess there are negative connotations associated with 'being a Schmidt'. Yes, sometimes I humiliate myself in front of my entire year. Yes, I say absolutely ridiculous things that elicit someone, nay anyone, to shout out 'Luce... Douchebag jar, now.'

Mindy has been saying it for a couple of years now. Yet I always thought there was a hidden jokey sense within her comments. This quiz confirmed what I had spent so long dismissing as a humorous falsity.

And then I have a realisation. A Schmidt moment, if you will. Who said being a Schmidt had to be a bad thing? Schmidt provides a welcome relief to the other loft mates who are all separately struggling with the difficulties of early adulthood. He is successful and embraces this achievement. He is a hit with the opposite sex, so must possess a charming quality that makes the ladies swoon. Heck, he even has an eye for fashion and can appreciate the need for a good suit and good lighting. When life gets him down, he knows it's all about the recovery. Because, hey, Schmidt happens.

So, ladies and gentlemen, I would request that you look past the superficial arrogant and douche-y qualities that are seen by so many. Peel away the layers of the onion (jar, Lucy) and discover the true Schmidty.

Because, after all, we built this Scmidty on Tootsie Rolls.

L x

An Ode To Brunch

To say that I liked brunch would be a massive understatement. I love brunch almost as much as I love the  fact that Miranda Kerr and Orlando Bloom are now both single (though it sucks for Flynn and romantics everywhere, I think I could easily bag either of them. No? Ok...), Yes, I really like brunch. Honestly, what is not to love about brunch? You get to eat bacon,  A LOT OF BACON at the slightly later hour that brunch requires. You get to natter and catch up with friends. You get to stuff your face because it's two meals right?!

Did I mention you get to eat bacon?!

At first, I was of the naive assumption that you could brunch with anyone. I believed that this was a food-focused event and the company was only there to stop you eating your bacon alone and tell you politely that you've had enough to eat. But how wrong I was.

Your brunch crew is a fundamental component of a good bruncheon. Take a leaf out of the book of the girls from Sex and the City and brunch with your closest friends who you don't necessarily see a lot. Then, you've got a lot to catch up on and the light chit-chat is the perfect accompaniment for eating too much. Let's be real here, you've really got to know the special people. It can't just be anyone. I would even be wary of going to brunch with a member of the opposite sex. What if they don't appreciate the sanctity of brunch and all that it entails? I'm just saying, be careful, folks.

Now, I wouldn't consider myself to be the ultimate expert on the best brunch locations in London, because I am sure that there are some hidden gems that me and my friends are yet to discover. But I thought I'd share with you some of my favourite brunch locations around the city.

Bill's
A classic choice. A branch of Bill's can be throughout London, such as Chiswick, Richmond, Wimbledon, Kensington and Islington, and also outside of London in locations such as Bath and Oxford. So you're never too far from a Bill's and those incredible blueberry pancakes.

VQ
YOU CAN GET PANCAKES 24 HOURS A DAY!!!! Yes, this is a 24 hour brunch spot in the heart of Chelsea so there is really no excuse not to brunch.

Muriel's Kitchen
Because it is just a stone's throw away from South Kensington station, Muriel's is the perfect place to meet up with friends before heading off shopping to burn off all those well-deserved brunch calories.

Upsy Daisy Bakery
Anyone special in my life gets taken to the Upsy Daisy Bakery as a sort of initiation into the proper elite. It's one of those tucked away gems that no one really knows about, but it's everything you would want from a casual brunch. I love it.

The Riding House Cafe
I'll admit it, I've never actually visited this brunch haven, but the little green monster within me summons itself every time someone I know hashtags #ridinghousecafe on Instagram. I'm jealous, ok?

Dishoom
Another one that I haven't visited for brunch, but I can vouch for their bombay-style evening menu. The evening food was absolutely delicious, even if it is one of those 'trendy' no-book places. If their brunch is half as good as the rest of it, I'm sure it's a real treat.



Continuing with my life-long dream of being a part of a John Hughes movie, I would like to suggest a sort of gang. Much like 'The Breakfast Club'.

But instead. 'The Brunch Club'...

Applications will be accepted from early 2014 with a formal interview being conducted shortly thereafter.

L x

How To Be More Like Kate Middleton: The Royal Guide

I have only three main goals/resolutions for the looming year ahead and they are as follows:

1. To become better at decision making (blaming my indecisiveness on my star sign - Libra's are supposedly rubbish at making important choices)
2. Read 25 quality books
3. Be more like Kate Middleton

I'm not even joking with the last one. Kate Middleton is far from being short of admirers, and, without exaggerating, I certainly believe that we could all learn a thing or two from her. Buzz Feed even published an article yesterday titled '27 Times Kate Middleton Proved She Was The Most Flawless Human in 2013'

Baby, you light up my world like nobody else...

This woman can really do no wrong. She has a baby - she looks good. She goes to boring events - she looks good. She stands next to Prince Harry - she looks good. So, in 2014, it is my aim, no, my duty, to be a bit more like Kate Middleton. If you decide to be a copy cat, follow my decisive guide to being just a smidgen more like Her Royal Highness.

(Being decisive and following in K-Middy's footsteps. Killing two resolutions with one stone before 2014 has even begun. Kicking butt already, I like it.)

The Hair
Can we just stand back and appreciate how Kate Middleton's hair always remains beautifully wavy without falling flat? In my quest to be more like my dearest princess, I bought some large curling tongs so I too could get the oh-so typical Kate waves.

HA. HA. HA. Good one.

I think the curlers thought that they could trick me, because basically achieving any type of wave that is acceptable to leave the house in is very difficult indeed. And when it does go vaguely right, it is so momentous that it requires at least 15 selfies and a Snapchat to everyone you know.

Can I also just say that it's a really nice colour?

The fashion
Because I'm not a mega-millionaire/not everyone would bend over backwards for a lock of my hair, I can't afford Kate's stylish yet demure wardrobe, I'm going to have to try and re-create sophistication on a much smaller budget. Tips to consider:

• There is no outfit that a jacket cannot improve
• Princesses can wear jeans
• A hat can improve an outfit. However, there is a strict line between fascinating (tried to make a hat joke. Failed to make a hat joke) and Princess Beatrice and Eugenie.
• Being pregnant is no excuse for slacking in the style department (hopefully this will not be a problem for me in 2014. Well, apart from this post-Christmas food baby)

The Make-Up
Such a perfect human being probably does not need any physical adjustments, but those she makes just bring out the little green monster in me. Once again, her access to the best brands definitely have an involvement in the angelic glow-y quality of her skin. Ethereal even.

She doesn't over-do it on the make-up, coz she's a princess lyk, but always takes a tip from yours truly (or so I let myself believe) by always using just a touch of eye-liner to emphasise the eyes.

Of course, for a more comprehensive guide, follow this WikiHow on how you can replicate K-Middy's make-up at home. I tried to find a guide complete with cheesy, absurd stock images... but, alas, with little avail. This one will have to suffice.

The Smile

SMILE AND WAVE, KATE. SMILE AND WAVE.

Well, I mean, apparently it's down to thousands of pounds spent on dental whitening, but it's nothing that cannot be replicated at home. Easily available, whitening shampoo or an at-home whitening kit will be needed.

But, more importantly, the trick is to know when to smile. To keep things simple, just smile when out in public. It's what Her Royal Highness would do.

The Work
Even managed to divide this one into two sub-sections. I'm pretty fancy. Much like Kate.

Education - She became even more sophisticated in my mind when I realised that she studied History of Art at St Andrews University. It just seems like a sophisticated subject.
So, to be more like her, ditch all of your true ambitions and do History of Art. It may bag you a prince.

Charity work - Yes, she probably has to get involved to keep up the image and whatever. But, she does genuinely seem like she cares and is passionate about what she gets involved with and wants to use her status to make a difference. So why not, in 2014, aim to better yourself by trying to better the lives of others.
Now that's a thought.



Right now, I may be more 'The Princess Diaries' than the Royal Princess, but we can all hope/pray that by the end of 2014 I am just a little bit more sophisticated/classy/princess-y.
Keep me in your New Year's prayers
L x

The 10 Dodgiest Christmas Songs Of All Time

Sadly, not everyone can be a Michael Bublé and be able to sum up Christmas spirit using his sweet vocal chords. For our returning post (sorry), because it is only five days until Santa comes and because we are horribly cynical, we have created a compilation of the 10 most bizarre Christmas songs/covers out there. You're welcome.

Insert Awkward reference here, obviously

'Baby It's Cold Outside'

Listen to the lyrics of the song.

Think of date rape.

Listen to the lyrics of the song again.

We couldn't post the original video, sung by Tom Jones & Cerys Matthews, because it scarred us too much and we wouldn't want to impose that on anybody else. (Again, you're welcome) 

But really, watch ahead. Viewer discretion advised. Don't say we didn't warn you.

Special mention should go to Jessica Simpson and Nick Lachey for making a creepy song even more disturbing.  We're not saying that this cover was the reason for their ridiculously upsetting divorce, but they never denied it either. 

Destiny's Child '8 Days of Christmas'
Don't get us wrong, we absolutely adore this song and all that Beyoncé, Kelly (and Michelle) brought to the table during their reign, but the concept of the song is just a tad weird.
Like, is this the song about the less generous boyfriend that bought his shawty cars and dirty denim jeans for the first 8 days of Christmas but then abandoned the final four days. Awkard breakup? Probably Michelle's fault.

Chris Brown 'This Christmas'

'Nuff said

Justin Bieber 'Drummer Boy'
Busta Rhymes came out of hibernation for this? His rap is almost incomprehensible and it is unforgivable to mention Twitter twice in a Christmas song.
Attention must be drawn to the creepy part when Biebs says "glow" for about 5 minutes. It's a good thing JB is retiring so we'll never have to hear his dodgy rapping ever again.

N Sync 'Merry Christmas Happy Holidays'
WE LOVE YOU NSYNC COME BACK TO US.
But srsly guiz, did you have to? You are a group of four grown white men, you will never be able to sound like a gospel choir, don't even try.
We lusm though.

East 17 'Stay Another Day'
This is the best song of all time, let alone Xmas song. But the video. My god, the video.
It's like the producers had just discovered Windows Movie Maker and East 17 themselves had just discovered ski jackets. It is so weird. What's with all the zooming and that random veiled lady that occasionally pops up?
Shout out to the one with the dodgy teeth who wore a baseball cap under his furry hood throughout the whole video.

David Hasselhoff - The Night Before Christmas album
Special mention to 'Feliz Navidad'. There is something undeniably creepy about the Hoff and he doesn't quite capture the festive vibe. Not for us at least. Maybe hairy stomached men are your type.

Steps 'Merry X-Mas Everybody' 
This song is so Steps, it's unreal. They've taking a well known classic xmas tune, auto-tuned themselves into it and added a strong drum machine backing track; ie. They have Stepsicised it.
This song is great but you should just listen to the original.
Shout out to the robot who sings a bit in the middle.

TOWIE cast 'Last Christmas'
Where to begin with this one...
The talking... (especially the awful bit with Mario and Lucy) (and the lovely "I can't wait to get my christmas vajazzle" from Sam)
The flashbacks to episodes... (in black and white nonetheless)
The fact none of them can sing.... (Don't even try Gemma)
All of it really.
It's also so weird that barely any of the Essex residents in the music video are in the show anymore.

Disney Channel - The Greatest Hits
This isn't just one song. It's a whole album of Christmas songs from the OG Disney kids. And Billy Ray Cyrus.
Special mentions to Kyle Massey's Hip Hop Carol and the Jonas Brothers' bizarrely titled 'Girl of My Dreams'.

So there you have it. The 10 dodgiest Christmas songs/covers of all time.

We hope you have a brilliant Christmas filled with all sorts of wonderful, and less wonderful, songs.
The two of us are going to try and make a big effort in 2014 to blog regularly without the interval of 8 months...

M and L x (yes, we did this one together)

'Little Things' Is An Important Song For Our Time

Before you exit this web page because you think this is just a crazed One Direction-related post, please read on. I'm not some crazy obsessed fan, I don't tweet Mr Styles every time my grandma dies (on a side note follow @HarryMyCatDied for hilarious tweets from bonkers fans)

But you've kinda got to admire these boys. Kind of. Yes, they were churned out of the Simon Cowell machine, destined to make millions from the beginning due to their dashing good looks, but they've come quite far in just a couple of years. And be honest, if you saw Louis Tomlinson and his girlfriend clothes shopping in Harvey Nichols, you'd probably do some subtle stalking... ok just me?

In 2012, they released their second studio album in just under a year and released their first single from it, 'Little Things'. Admittedly it follows the same themes as most of their other songs, as it's about a girl. Original. But this one is so different, and, in my opinion, actually speaks a very important message to young people today, their audience.

Harry, stop giving me those eyes. You're with Taylor, it would be inappropriate.

Before you start to think I'm a complete loony, listen to some of the songs on their first album. The girls they sing of are portrayed as absolute angels. Just listen to some of the lyrics from their first album. 'The way that you flip your hair gets me overwhelmed'?! Are you serious, there's this great girl in front of you, and the best thing you can find to comment on is her hair? Additionally, 'It's everything about you, everything that you do'. And they're not half picky these boys: 'I NEED that One Thing and you've got that One Thing'. No pressure there then.

Don't get me wrong, I know why One Direction only sing about getting girls and falling in love. Because of their target market (spotty pre-teen girls whose most serious relationships are with their teddy bears), they know they will make money from making these girls swoon. But some of these girls, they're no Victoria's Secret Angels. They write fan fiction, for Christ's sake.

Look, you've got to stop freaking out when I flip my hair, Zayn...

So 'Little Things' was a huge breath of fresh air. How awesome is it to be told that that its ok to 'never want to know how much you weigh'?? (Especially after a super-indulgent festive period). It's true, the majority of girls don't like their stomach or their thighs. Can we all just collectively ignore the stupid line 'You can't go to bed without a cup of tea, and maybe that's the reason that you talk in your sleep. And all those conversations are the secrets that I keep, though it makes no sense to me', like are you serious? C'mon Louis, buck up.

Back to the important issue at hand. Girls nowadays suffer from so many self-esteem issues, never believing that they are good enough to get the guy. Let alone bag a member of One Direction. And whose to blame for a whole generation, and probably even generations before, developing confidence issues? The media and the artists of today, that's who. Or, in One Direction's case, their songwriters.

It seems as if you cannot go on the Internet anymore without being told that a celebrity is struggling to keep off the pounds, therefore being branded as 'fat'. She's not fat, she's 110 pounds for Christ's sake. These online newspapers then proceed to publish articles about how low self-esteem is ruining so many bright futures. Ironic much?! I'm talking about you, Mail Online.

Living in a big city like London, it is hard to avoid models and London Fashion Week. I believe LFW is a great way of showcasing British talent, but in recent years, controversy surrounding Size 0 models has hit the headlines, reaching the eyes of millions of easily-manipulated teenage girls. Although London isn't the most popular fashion capital for using Size 0 models, it's still happening. Back in 2011, the nations beloved SamCam, wife of the less loved PM David Cameron, said she was 'disgusted' by the inclusion of a Size 0 model at a show she attended. Hey model, it's not normal to look skeletal and it don't suit you, babe.

On the subject of self-esteem issues, let me bring up a topical issue that you may/may not be aware of. You'll undoubtedly have seem them. The yobs at the back of the bus will usually leave them around. You may even know someone who buys it just to see them. That's right, I'm talking about The Sun's Page 3 models. These hugely out-of-proportion girls are basically telling girls everywhere that they have to look like that. They may not be realising they're doing it or doing it intentionally because they don't think that their audience may include young girls, but yeah, they're doing it. Don't even get me started on the over-sexualisation of youngsters. I think I'm too young/not mardy enough to address that right now.

These images are basically saying that this is what young women everywhere should look like. No slightly flabby thighs for you, missy. So we are trying to get rid of it. Forever.

So here is today's task for you. Two things actually.
1) Sign this petition to get rid of the Page 3 models, and then tell absolutely everyone you know to sign it.
2) Listen to Little Things, open a box of Quality Street and hug your normal thighs. They're not thunder thighs, I promise. You go girl.

So girls, stretch marks are fine. Spots are cool too. Because, hey, you may still bag a member of One Direction. I hear Niall may be free...

L x

Ten Reasons Why It Was Great To Be A Brit In 2012

Let's be honest, it's been a pretty banging year. In case you have been living under a rock for the past year and have only re-surfaced for the festive period (something I feel I partook in slightly. Except my rock had internet access), it's been like one non-stop party for the Brits this year. We waved our hands in the air and, boy, we waved them like we didn't care.

But as we say goodbye to another year and look forward to another one, I thought it would be nice to look back at a pretty fabaroonie year. Let's just forget about all the bad things that happened this year. Recession-schmession.

1) The Diamond Jubilee

Yes it rained that long weekend. It rained a lot. But that didn't stop us drinking all the Pimms we could lay our hands on and still having a jolly good time. We saw our incredible Queen and Prince Philip brave the elements to travel down the Thames in the Jubilee Pageant  which, whether you liked it or not, you cannot deny was pretty impressive. In a time like this when lots are struggling financially, it was a symbol of unity.
If you are already cringing at my cheesiness, do yourself a favour and stop reading now. It's only going to get worse as I get more patriotic.

2) The London 2012 Olympics and Paralympics
Cor blimey, nobody thought we would do it. But we became rather secretly smug as soon as we saw Mr Beckham floating down the Thames, luscious wind-swept locks, holding the torch. And if you didn't cry during the opening/closing ceremony, you are a soulless person and therefore I will probably assume that you're ginger. I think it truly made people proud to be British (and it gave me an excuse to watch the television all summer).

I know everyone is saying it, but seriously, it couldn't have been done without all of us. The British public. If we hadn't had been behind it and backing it, which admittedly at first we weren't, then it would have failed. But we all helped in our own little way, some more than others. Now would be a really appropriate time to thank all the Gamesmakers and Ambassadors, because, hey, if a tourist had gone up to just anyone in Waterloo Station, someone would've got hurt. I say Waterloo because my fabulous mother was actually a London Ambassador situated in Waterloo. Yes, she still has her pink and purple uniform. No, she won't let me wear it.

3) Team GB

4) #royalbaby
One of the reasons we already know that 2013 will be totes ah-mazing, daahling. The nation's sweetheart (not you Chezza) got her hair cut, and we already knew it. I told you all, physic alert.

5) UK Cinema
We had the latest Bond film, Skyfall, hitting our screens in October as well as other films like The Woman In Black, Wrath Of The Titans and The Hobbit released as British films. Ok, maybe they haven't been our greatest ever. But, hey Hollywood, we have 007. And Harry Potter. So yeah.

6) UK Music
So Emile Sande seemed to be absolutely everywhere this year and it became a leeeetle bit of a joke by the end, but you can't deny she has a great voice. It's also been a great year for other British artists like Mumford & Sons, Ed Sheeran and Adele. And One Direction. Like them or not, they've had a stonking year.
It was also the year that Girls Aloud confirmed their reunion, so we'll be expecting great things from this sassy bunch in 2013.

7) It was THE year for British fashion
One of the most memorable part of the Olympic closing ceremony (apart from the countless appearances from Sir Paul McCartney and Emile Sande, pipe down you two) was the fashion segment, when some gorgeous British household name models strutted their stuff in gold, what else? Lily Donaldson, Naomi Campbell, Stella Tennant, Kate Moss, Karen Elson, Georgia May Jagger, Jourdan Dunn, Lily Cole and, who could forget, David Gandy, dressed head to toe in British designers. So it wasn't as fabulous as the Spice Girls reunion, but it was pretty damn close.

Another, more light-hearted nod to British fashion was The Mayor of London's collaboration with Grazia magazine, named 'Hatwalk' where we saw all the famous historical faces we know so well accessorised with a hat. Hey Nelson, nice Union patterned thingamajig you got going on.

8) The world didn't end!
So this isn't strictly British-related, but hey, I know you breathed a sigh of relief and switched the kettle on when you knew we hadn't been stuck by a zombie apocalypse.
I mean, I never really believed it, but hey, you can never be TOO cautious.

9) We had some GREAT anniversaries!
The Jubilee wasn't the only anniversary worth celebrating this year. Other notable ones include:

• 50 years since the first Beatles single was released
• The sandwich is 250 years old!
• Shakespeare is 400
• Charles Dickens is 200
• 50 years of Bond films. All together now da da da da daaa da da da daa da da da da da da daaa

10) Hey, we're fabulous every year

We're such a quirky country with our traditions, and, honestly, it makes me proud as an iPhone 5 owner. We drink around 165 million cups of tea EVERY DAY and we do love our Christmas traditions. We have the pantomime, Christmas crackers and mince pies. Apparently not many other countries do that. News to me.

Also, we have our royal family who, like them or not, make us unique and lovable as a free National Health Service. You can't complain with that.

Oh. And cool accents.

I tried to come up with 12. Trust me, I tried my hardest. But I feel this isn't quite the audience to be talking about Innovation and Inventions in Britain. Maybe next year.

So there you go. The best bits of 2012 in a nut shell. 2013 is going to be a real game-changer for me, let's bring it on.

L x

Merry Christmas from Lackadaisical in London!

We both just wanted to take this opportunity to wish all of our wonderful readers and followers a fantastic Christmas and a happy New Year! Bring on 2013, it's going to be a BIG one!

And now, after our message is done, to waste some blog space, let's post some pictures of our less-than-average Gingerbread attempts.

Hmm... Everything's in order and it has a colour scheme... I wonder who made this one?

And before it collapsed... this is Mindy's

So, once again, stuff yourselves silly with Christmas dinner and have a really enjoyable day
(I will readily accept any unwanted red Quality Street. You can thank me later)

L and M x

CONCERT REVIEW: Mumford & Sons

So, earlier in the week, Tuesday 18th to be precise, I got invited to the final date of Mumford & Son's 'Tour of Two Halves' at the O2. Yes, the freakin' O2. These are the four boys that went to local schools, and are now playing at great ol' arenas like the O2.
Feeling very privileged, I arrived at the arena, only to be escorted to the VIP entrance and headed to a box. Yes, I was to watch the boys perform from a box. No more moshpit-ing for me.
Honestly, I'd never heard of the first support act, Bear's Den, but I managed to get there in time for the second support, Mystery Jets with a belly full of Mexican food. Mexican, Mystery Jets and Mumford. Sounds like a good combo to me.
I LOVE THE MYSTERY JETS. So my evening was already off to a good start. I just remember turning to my sister as soon as we heard the opening to 'Two Doors Down', both our favourite Jets song. The only awkward thing about being in a box, above all the 'moshpitting commoners' as they came to be known, was that it became very hard to dance. Bopping in your seat doesn't have quite the same effect. And the friends that invited us to their box also invited a bunch of artsy fartsy types. Imagine the looks when our family turned up, me and my sister almost ready to cry and my dad in a tweed jacket. TWEED JACKET. Of all the nights...
And then the moment came...

As the lights of the O2 went down, the buzz of excitement rised. The beginning of the first track on their second album, and also the song it was named after, Babel, rings out across the whole stadium. You see four silhouettes appear appear the blood red curtain, and suddenly the curtain falls and the screaming begins. And that's just me.
The great thing about Mumford & Sons is that they all actually play their instrument. And more than one at that. We are so used to electronic music, and artists like Katy Perry who view their concerts as 'shows'. Mumford & Sons manage to combine the two effortlessly. The music is flawless, lively and upbeat and you can't take your eyes of them either.
Between songs, they pick up different instruments before belting out another catchy yet different song that you just have to sing along to, regardless of the stylish dressed 20-something standing next to you.
For me, bopping still proved a difficulty and part of me wanted to be down in the standing area, closer to the slightly messy-looking beardy folk on stage, but I loved being able to take it all in from a distance. I could appreciate the music without being soaked in someone elses sweat (this will reappear later, watch out) and rubbing up against some strangers body. Hmm, happy holidays.
They play out every song on their new album, and some of the bigger ones on their first album flawlessly, barely pausing for oxygen. It was so admirable, these men are so talented at what they do and genuinely seem as if they enjoy. I, and many others, never took them for the sort of band to play stadiums and big arenas, and I don't think they did either. But that's just how it played out. However, the lights draped above the heads of those standing made it feel a intimate occasion. Or however intimate you can get you and 23,000 others.

And just when you thought it was other, the thank you's said and done, they reappeared in the centre of stadium to sing an acapella song before rushing back to the stage to sing their last song, and perhaps their most well known 'The Cave', before wearily leaving the stage, back pats a plenty. I imagine it must have been quite sentimental, with it being their last show of 2012. And what a year it has been for them.

For me, this is when the night became rather dream like. I got given an Access All Areas pass. Technically, this is the end of the concert review, which in case you couldn't decipher, I enjoyed. But read on if you fancy potentially boiling over with jealousy.

And five minutes later, there I was, backstage at the O2 arena, Marcus Mumford all up in my face, shaking my hand with his sweaty palms and informing me that he is called Marcus. Like I didn't freaking know. If you care to image how close we were, probably as close as you are to your computer monitor phone/device right now. Maybe closer.

After meeting the other boys (for all non-fans, they're not his sons), I didn't think my life could ever reach this point of ecstasy again. Enter Carey Mulligan and Colin Firth. Now, I like to consider me and Colin to be quite good friends. He doesn't know it, but I believe this because we happen to live in the same area and I know what he is eating Christmas Day. Please don't tell the police.

But Carey Mulligan may or may not be my idol. If she knew how much I was obsessed with The Great Gatbsy, she would steer clear of me. But not that night. I kept it cool, I think the leather jacket was admitting some kind of 'cool hormone' into my skin. I'll ask my Biology teacher. I'm sure it's a real thing.

Can I just take a moment to digress? Pretty sure Carey Mulligan is officially 'The Coolest 20-Something In The World'. She started off playing Kitty in the incredibly Keira Knightley version of 'Pride and Prejudice', and I'm a true Austen girl at heart, before starring in one of my all time favourite films 'An Education'. Now she's married to Marcus Mumford, the man whose sweat I am currently soaking in and is best friends with Colin Firth. Oh, and she's Daisy in Baz Luhrmann's version of 'The Great Gatsby' due out next year. Yes, that does mean she has pulled Leonardo DiCaprio. Cue screams.

We ended up talking for about five minutes about babies, ping-pong and, of course, the wonderful Marcus. I don't think she sussed how obsessed with her I was, kudos to me.

I still can't believe how fab the evening was and, after all of that, my highlight still has to be the first few notes of Babel and the sheer excitement ringing around the stadium. Absolutely unforgettable.

L x

End Of The World Survival Guide

If you are into that kind of thing, the world is due to end on Friday. So all of your December allowance that you spent on that Christmas gift for your parents that probably won't be appreciated? Yeah, they won't ever receive it.

But if you have serious plans about surviving in the world post-apocalypse, then follow some of these tips. Some require more forward planning than others, but of course, as I'm probably the most organised teenager on the planet (pre end of the world AND post), I have been preparing for months.

In the event of a zombie outbreak...
Strangely enough, the English local authority suggests keeping a stun gun near you at all times, as well as handcuffs and a protective suit.
If a zombie comes near you, don't freak out. Easier said than done. But seriously, freaking out will only make them angry, or so I'm told. And, according to various survival posters, do not place your neck in the zombie's teeth. Hmm. However, if said zombie does bite you, apply pressure and prepare to die.

Just joking.
Not.

Interesting fact. Don't burn zombies. Because burning zombies will release toxic fumes that could affect other people. You have been warned.

Assuming you escape the wrath of the zombie attack you will need to sprint. And sprint fast. Seriously, get your Usain Bolt on. From all the hundreds of zombie-related movies I have watched (just Shaun Of The Dead), zombies cannot run, or indeed walk very fast at all. It seems to be because they are all dragged down by their obscene amounts of fat, or even the hideous hoards of facial hair (see above). I don't know, just a thought.
Anyway, this is some end of the world preparation that I have found surprisingly difficult. I mean, the effort it takes to haul myself onto a treadmill or indeed, god forbid, actually leave the house, isn't really worth it. And anyway, I've always fancied becoming a zombie.
Okay, maybe not. Still can't be bothered to practice my running.

So, imagine this. You're all alone. By now, you've escaped the zombie attack and proved that you're as unfit as anything. Surely there's got to be some other survivors? When you run into them, don't let them leave your side. You need to assemble an army! Don't be picky, because Bear Grylls and Jonah Hill are probably already 'on the other side' (Bear Grylls would actually be useful. Jonah Hill would just provide some light entertainment). Everyone has some kind of skill, whether big or small. And hey, you will always need someone who can make sounds with their armpits.

Don't expect your army to look anything like this:

Set your expectations a little bit lower...

Being like the Rugrats doesn't have to be a bad thing. Quite the contrary, post-apocalyptic pal. Bagsy the ginger one. Trendy glasses bro.

You've got your crew, you're feeling pretty big and strong. But I warn you, don't attack the zombie. You'll always be outnumbered, and you're no David Hayes. Unless you are. Hi David.

Finally, hope you run into Leonardo DiCaprio soon. He's probably out there, searching for a like-minded attractive human being to repopulate the Earth. I'm right here, Leo.

Good luck and be safe out there.
See you on the other side

L x

A Dummy's Guide To This Week's News: 9/12/12 - 16/12/12

Sandy Hook Elementary School Shooting

It was the news that shook the world this week and made us all just a little bit more grateful this festive season. 20 year old Adam Lanza got into the elementary school, although reports state different things. Some suggest that he was buzzed in, others that he forced his way in, and a more recent one suggests that he shot his way in. Once in, he proceeded to shoot 20 children, 12 girls and 8 boys and seven members of staff, all female, including his own mother Nancy Lanza.

One of the women shot was Victoria Soto, a hero, who shielded her students before taking the bullet herself.
In the immediate aftermath, our thoughts are with the families who will go without a child this Christmas and with the loved ones of the victims and witnesses alike. However, once some sense of 'normality' has returned, if that's possible, changes to America's gun-laws will no doubt be demanded.


Feeling compelled to help? Here are several ways you can:

• Sign this petition to demand a conversation about gun laws in the US. Even if you're not from the US, it's only a signiture and could save lives in the future
• Send your condolences to the loved ones of the victims
• Donate to one of the several relief funds to pay for funeral expenses, counselling for students etc. Here is one link of many

Suicide after 'Kate Hoax'
Jacintha Saldanha, who was fooled by a hoax call by two Australian DJs, Mel Greig and Michael Christian (picture below), was found hanged in her nurse's quarters three days after the two presenters called pretending to be The Queen and Prince Phillip.

The nurse, who worked at King Edward VII hospital where Kate Middleton was being treated for morning sickness, apparently left three suicide notes. One detailed her funeral requests, one refers to the hoax call and the last critics the hospital and staff at King Edward's.
The two presenters are said to be 'gutted and heartbroken' over the death, and an Australian inquest has opened.
The body of Jacintha Saldanha arrived in Mangalore, India on Sunday 16th, where she will be laid to rest.


And on a lighter note...

Harry Styles and Taylor Swift got together!

Some are over the moon, some are already sending her death threats, and some are readily awaiting the release of her next album, filled to the brim with songs about their break up.
The 18 year old has supposedly 'fallen for her in a big way'. Yes, her. The 23 year old Taylor Swift. Yes, the Taylor Swift that gets around a little bit.
It was also the lady in questions birthday this week, and Harry treated her to 23 cupcakes and, err, a trip to his local Chinese restaurant in Holmes Chapel, Chesire.
Congrats, Harry. It's only a five year gap. We're so proud of you!

Gangnam Style Can Kill You!

If you're middle-aged and heading to a Christmas party this week, then be warned. Firstly, yes, Gangnam Style will definitely be on the questionable, tacky playlist and secondly, it may kill you.

46 year old Eamonn Kilbride from Lancashire  started suffering chest pains after performing an energetic version of the Psy song, before dying at Royal Blackburn Hospital.
However, fear not. According to doctors, there isn't some part of K-pop that makes you more prone to death, but doing erratic physical exercise that you are not used to can be damaging.
Hey, even Psy himself claims to have developed blood clots from his horse-like dancing in Gangnam Style. Don't say I didn't warn you.

The Rookie's Guide To Christmas Television 2012

So it's the time of year that you walk into a shopping centre and it is absolutely filled to the brim with stores advertising their 'great party dress deals' and far too many strapless dresses to make you wish shoulders had never been invented. Don't they know that everyone just stays in over the Christmas period because:
a) it's too cold
b) we have no friends
c) Christmas TV is too fabulous to consider going out
d)we really should be revising

Of course, I'm generalising by calling myself 'normal'. Error. But, on a serious note, if you've stocked up on enough Quality Street to see you through the season (I'd recommend about one large tin per evening), then you're pretty much set. And, hey, use this guide as your Ultimate Christmas 2012 TV Bible. We're here to help.


Victoria's Secret Fashion Show

When: 22nd December, E! 9:00pm
What: One runway, most of my favourite human beings on the earth. Miranda Kerr, Jourdan Dunn, Lily Aldridge, Cara Delevigne, Lily Donaldson and Erin Heatheron on the same runway, plus more? Sign me up!
Why: So it's not technically related to Christmas but it will probably inspire you to lay off the Pringles and hit the gym on Boxing Day. Actually, maybe it's best avoided...



Mr Stink

When: 23rd December, BBC1 6:30pm
What: 12 year old Chloe befriends a pungent tramp called Mr Stink and they become friends. Charming. However, it is adapted from the book by David Walliams, who happens to play the Prime Minister. So it'll probably be a good 'un
Why: Because Hugh Bonneville (Lord Grantham, you twits) is in it as well as some other girls I know, so I know I'll be watching. And considering I have a really large army of people who copy my every move, I'm pretty sure they'll be doing the same.




Downton Abbey

When:  Christmas Day, ITV1 8:45pm
What: Supposedly, the episode features the Crawley family visiting Duneagle Castle in Scotland to see Lady Rose and her parents and Mr Carson desperately tries to keep the servants in check back at Downton Abbey. The ITV Director of Drama Laura Mackie says 'best have the tissues ready!'
Don't say you haven't been warned
Why: Because it's Downton Abbey, fool

Top Of The Tops: Christmas Special

When: Christmas Day, BBC1, 2pm
What: Hosted my Reggie Yates (my fave) and Fearne Cotton (ok, maybe not my fave), but expect performanes from Little Mix, One Direction, Robbie Williams, Ollie Murs, Rihanna, Katy Perry and Cheryl Cole...
Why: I didn't even realise Top Of The Tops was still running! Isn't that reason enough?

Doctor Who

When: Christmas Day, BBC1, 5:20pm
What: Set in Victorian London, where new assistant Clara is looking after the children of wealthy widower Captain Latimer, the Doctor arrives to confront crazy-ass snowpeople.
Why: The theme music. 'Nuff said.



Call The Midwife

When: Christmas Day, 7:30pm, BBC1
What: Chummy organises a nativity play and bonds with young girl in need of a guardian angel, while Jenny Lee helps an old lady put her past to rest. Apparently it's meant to be upbeat...
Why: It's their first Christmas special, so we should all try and be nice to them. Although I've never actually watched the show, I have been assured that it's absolutely fantabadoosie.


Miranda

When: Boxing Day, BBC1, 9:00pm
What: Penny is threatening to cancel Miranda's Christmas if she doesn't sort her life out...
Why: Let's be honest, whether it is good or not, it will be SUCH FUN!



And what I won't be watching...

A Very JLS Christmas

When: 23rd December, Sky1, 6pm
What: They will basically be singing some songs and giving out some presents. And yes, they will probably be wearing white vests and flexing. You have been warned.
Why not: I don't have the emotional capability to deal with this right now.

So there you have it. Let me know how it all turns out. Because of course, I'll have my head in the books. Hopefully.

L x

'Great' Gift Ideas From A Hopeless Shopper

It's that time of year, folks. Yes, the time of year that you can't say that you like anything at all without finding it wrapped under your tree on December 25th... Joked about liking that novelty Pom Pom scarf? Oh well, it's too late to return it now.
But we're all guilty of it. Having to buy gifts can be so tricky, we clutch straws trying to think of something, anything that the recipient might get an ounce of joy from...

Still stuck for ideas? Here's another (probably useless) gift guide from someone who is trying to gather inspiration (for next year, obviously) as much as the next person.

MUM
I would usually tend to discourage buying mothers kitchen-related goodies/equipment (until December 20th when you get desperate and all rational thinking goes out of the window) because that's not really a gift for her; it's a gift for the kitchen. And, lets be honest, our mums deserve a bit of love of Christmas. A special gift, because if they're anything like my mum, they've spent months preparing every last detail and planned every single situation until its flawless. Mum, you rock.
Of course, your mum might love kitchen related gifts. If that's the case, why are you still reading?!? You should be at Lakeland!

• Bath oils
• Cookbooks
• Magazine subscription - something like Woman & Home or Homes and Garden should suffice. Alternatively, I'm sure food magazines are always appreciated.
• Spa voucher - Let's be honest, she's going to need a de-stress after the madness that is Christmas

DAD
I'm pretty sure my dad isn't your typical dad. Is your dad obsessed with a small, tiny furball (the dog) and play computer games for 6 hours non-stop at the age of 48? Genuinely, I don't know if this is the norm. Please let me know.

Dads are always the most difficult to buy for, especially when you're no longer seven or eight when it was acceptable to buy him a pack of cards with bird species on. Merry Christmas Dad, have a completely mundane gift that we both know you will never open. Love, your brainless daughter.

But, I've planned every situation here. Whether your dad is the stylish one, the nerdy one or the one who is obsessed with stamp collecting, I've got it covered:

• Some useless invention - a self stirring mug would be perfect
• Coffee machine - I'm pretty sure every dad could do with one of these, especially if he has two argumentative teenage daughters. Lusm dad
• Books. Something coffee table-ish

TEENAGE BOY
Basically, the teenage male population all need a good kick up the backside, because they all smell so horrifically awful. And that is an understatement. Imagine the abuse I had absent-mindedly subjected my nostrils to when I visited a boys school this week. Awful. Anyway, they basically need deodorant. You can either do this in a subtle way or... a not so subtle way.

Dear (insert name),
You smell, let's make next year less offensive to my sense of smell
Love,
(insert name)

• Lynx (that's Axe for all you non-UK readers) - it always becomes so cheap at Christmas time, and although I have no brother, I always stock up
• Cologne
• Some man perfume. Does this mean that they will look like those models on the adverts? Probably not, but we can all dream

And for other, non-stench related gifts:

• Christmas Jumper!! (Probably only for those 1nd13 bo111z)
• Video Games

TEENAGE GIRL
Teenagers are difficult enough to shop for, but teenage girls?! Wow. You have fun there. And let me know how it goes. LOL-COPTER.

• Greys Anatomy Box Set
• Make-Up
• Gift Cards
• Stationary - I don't think parent's fully appreciate how expensive stationary is. Please just buy me felt tip pens and cuddle me
• A Starbucks voucher - especially if they're a UK teen. GCSEs are not fun for anyway. This is a must-have if you fancy your teenage girl surviving this tough time (stop me now before I go on a rant about my life, eek)

LITTLE KIDS
Children these days just don't appreciate the finer things in life. And by finer things, I mean Busted, Tracy Beaker and Joseph and the Technicolor Dreamcoat. So this Christmas, as the doting older sibling, why not give them a taste of the early noughties?

• Teletubbies (is this show still running?)
• Jacqueline Wilson Books
• Playmobil
• Sylvanian Families!

OLD RELATIVES
This is a ridiculously tough one. The thing is, lets be honest, they've had so many Christmases and Birthday's that they no longer want/need anything (no offence). So this year, I'll be looking at getting my grandparents:

• A tea cosy, mainly for my benefit. Except for you Nana. Don't go anywhere near my kettle, you don't let it brew for long enough!! (grumpy tea-addict)
• Tins of biscuits
• Scarves and gloves
• Slippers
• Box Sets - no, perhaps not Little Britain. But I'm pretty sure there is a Masterchef or Downton Abbey fan in every 70-something year old person.

SECRET SANTA

This is a really tough one. It depends if there are any 'rules' applicable. For example, at school, there is absolute mayhem. Everyone gives a little something each day, you will be verbally abused if you don't. and get something bigger at the end. But others only have one gift at the end with a budget cap.
So. Ideas for all occasions.

• Starbucks Tumbler (who doesn't want 25p off every Starbucks?)
• Metre long box of Jaffa Cakes. Nom.
• DVDs
• Let's be honest, you'll never go wrong with chocolate. Any stressy, tired teenager will truly appreciate the gift of a quick sugar hit more than a cruddy, half-hearted gift.

You have been warned. Be wary of the chocolate deficient teenage. Symptoms include mood swings, panda eyes and greasy hair.

I hope you found my not-so comprehensive guide to gift ideas for all groups vaguely useful. And if you didn't, I hope you found at least some humour in it.

Of course, I finished my Christmas shopping weeks ago. Is my award for most organised teenager in the post or?

L x